Chitty Chitty Bang Bang gaed the muckle car's exhaust

Fae up here, Puddock could see richt ower tae the Firth o Forth and ayont, but his een settled no a stane's fling awa, on Edinburgh's Castle Street. For it wis here, at No. 30, that his makar wis born: Kenneth Grahame that gied puff tae Puddock, blate wee Mowdie, Pawkie Ratton and Brock, alang wi aw the ither characters o The Sauch In The Sauchies.

"Ayont the Gallus Wood cams the Gallus World," said the Ratton. "And yon's somethin that doesnae maitter, either tae you or me. I've never been there, and I'm never gaun, nor you either, if ye've got ony mense ava..." (fae The Sauch in the Sauchies)

The original survivor

No glaikit words thocht Puddock as he minded, wi a scunner that made his een skellie, a compatriot o Grahame's that had been hotchin tae venture intae the 'Gallus World' ayont. Born jist ower the Firth fae Edinburgh, at Largo in Fife, Alexander Selkirk had run aff tae sea in 1703 tae jouk his past. He jined the Sooth Sea buccaneers, and naw, yon wisnae the end o his trauchles. Mony months later, efter a stooshie wi his captain ower the seaworthiness o their vessel, Selkirk demandit tae be pit ashore on the uninhabitit island o Juan Fernandez (a guid walin as it turns oot since the ship later cowped, droonin maist o thaim onboard). It wid be anither fower-and-a-hauf year though afore Selkirk wis eventually rescued.

Though fantooshified, Selkirk's hi-jinks clearly kittled the imagination o Daniel Defoe for his Robinson Crusoe and Ben Gunn, the forhooied pirate fae Robert Louis Stevenson's Treasure Island. RLS's brither Edinburgher, R.M. Ballantyne, played a pairt as weel. For it wis his tale o three shipmogered English laddies (Ralph Rover, Jack and Peterkin), The Coral Island, that first spunked RLS's loe o the Sooth Seas, no tae mention lichtin the lowe for the mair recent Laird o the Flechs.

Anither beglamourin Potter

Back on drouthy land, Puddock's next stap is Birnam in Perthshire. For it wis here that Beatrix Potter spent her formative summers, hyne awa fae the stoor and vennels o London. She wrote The Tale o Peter Rabbit here and forgaithered wi the folk that kittled the couthie characters o Mrs Tiggywinkle and Jeremy Fisher. Tae mind us o this Scottish connection, The Birnam Institute hauds a Beatrix Potter exhibition and jist next door is a Beatrix Potter Gairden, fou o flouers, fungi and fitpaths raxin tae your favourite characters' bothies and bouries.

The King o Comics

Sklentin hard richt, back tae the sea braes, the next stap on Puddock's and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang's stravaig is the City o Discovery itsel, Dundee. It wis here that D.C. Thomson's The Beano wis lowsed in 1938. And ken whit, ower 60 year later, it's aye the maist popular comic amang eleeven year aulds. The secret o its success: lang-runnin favourites like 'Desperate Dan', 'Dennis the Menace', 'Gnasher', 'The Bash Street Kids', and 'Beryl the Peril', thegither wi a constant spate o new talent. Sae popular is it, that o aw the comics in Britain, The Beano brocht in the maist siller ever peyed at auction – £6,500 for a first issue.

It's no jist the early editions that hae a follaein either. This year's Beano Annual is ootsellin David Beckham's in the run up tae Yule. And while the daffery days o the late 1950s micht be by, when The Beano and its sister title The Dandy were baith sellin ower twa million copies a week, you can be siccar that Dennis aye has a hantle pavies left up his sark sleeve. Forby the comics, the annuals, the animated series, twa brawest-sellin videos, claes, snashters, an established Beano book range and nou twa Dennis the Menace novels, the characters will soon kythe in a computer gemme. 'Beanotoun Racin' is bein redd up by Dundee gemmes company Simian Industries and is tae be lowsed in the New Year.

Up, up and awa!

Dub-skelpin northwards again, oor next stap is Kirriemuir in Angus, birthplace o J.M. Barrie. The son o a wabster and ane o ten bairns, Barrie wis a thrang, steerie-fykie novelist and dramatist. Whit he's best kent for is his play aboot 'the laddie that widnae grow up'. Takkin inspiration fae his ain early bairnhood, as weel as his guardianship o the five Llewelyn Davies weans (The Tint Lads), Barrie creatit Peter Pan. Likely the maist famous bairns' play ever written, Peter Pan has been adaptit for film, television and stage. Braw news for the Great Ormond Street Hospital for Seik Weans tae wham Barrie gied its perpetual rights.

Whit's the story in Balamory?

Haurd left nou and Puddock is headin across country, ower wallie Ben Nevis, Glencoe and Loch Linnhe, tae the Inner Hebridean island o Mull. Thanks tae a BAFTA nominatit television series airted at unner sixes, the toun o Tobermory wi its gallus pentit hooses gaithered roond a quiet herbour, is experiencin a peedie tourism boom. How? Because mony o the 400,000 viewers that regularly tune in tae see whit's happenin wi their favourite characters in 'Balamory' want as weel tae visit whaur PC Ploom, Erchie the Inventor, Spencer the Penter and the lave o the ithers bide. An unprecedentit success, the lowsin o the first video and DVD fae the series sellt ower 21,000 copies in its first week, blooterin it to the tap o BBC Worldwide's brawest-sellin bairns' new releases chert. And there's mair tae follae wi the forthcomin lowsin o a PC CD-ROM gemme redd up by BAFTA award-winnin Glesga-based Absolute Studios.

Flittin wi the times

Finally hirplin hame tae Edinburgh, Puddock sets Chitty Chitty Bang Bang doon no a mile awa fae whaur we sterted, richt forenent anither fleein car, this time a blue Ford Anglia. The Weasley's cantrip car sits ootside a kenspeckle café on Edinburgh's George IV Brig. Ben the café is whaur JK Rowling bairned that modern-day superbogle o weans' fiction, Harry Potter. Five books in, sales o Harry Potter books have nou tappit a quarter o a billion in ower 200 countries worldwide and in 60 leids, fae Gujarati tae Ancient Greek. The world's best-kent boy warlock is cowpin aw kinn o records. His fifth book, Harry Potter And The Order O The Phoenix sellt 1.78 million copies in Britain on its first day alane. The brawest sellin book in e-tailin history, it's pairt o the Harry Potter series o audio books forby which has lowped the yin million sales dyke – a figure unprecedentit in the UK audio mercat.

Mibbe next time, insteid o takkin Ian Fleming's 'Chitty Chitty Bang Bang', we'll flit wi the times and use Floo Pouder insteid!